No matter who you are and no matter what your career and family circumstances might be, divorce is not easy. Divorce might be most complicated of all for parents who are trying to juggle work responsibilities with the needs of their children.
We recently read a blog post devoted to divorcing moms, but the advice and tips it contained can be applied just as easily to divorcing dads who are also balancing career, kids and their personal needs and desires for post-divorce life.
The first tip passed on to divorcing moms (and dads): “Keep your life compartmentalized.” It’s simply a fact that many parts of our complex lives spill over from the Work compartment into the Family compartment, Divorce compartment and Personal Life compartment. But your goal in your divorce should be to stay focused on the task at hand. When you’re working on spreadsheets in the office, focus on them rather than your divorce.
If you allow your divorce to take over all aspects of life, your children and work will get less than what they deserve. And you will get less than what you deserve as well.
Second tip: “Keep things civil during the divorce proceedings.” This is of extra importance for divorcing parents. Civility in the divorce prevents not only all-out legal war (an expensive way to go), but also helps parents set an example for their children on how to behave when dealing with difficult challenges.
Third tip: “Make time for yourself.” Divorce is very stressful, so it’s important to set aside time for you. Examples from the article we read include, “Watch your favorite sitcom for a half-our or sit down and read a book or maybe watch your favorite news program.”
We’re adding a fourth tip: Make sure that you have an experienced family law attorney who will protect you, your children and your rights and interests as a parent.